Communication is one of those skills that everyone assumes they’re “pretty good at.” Until they’re not.
In dentistry, coaching, and leadership, communication isn’t just a soft skill. It is the skill that shapes team culture, patient trust, and the outcomes of your most important conversations. And more often than not, the breakdown doesn’t happen because of what was said, but how it was delivered.
That was the focus of a recent IADLC Study Club session led by Brandi Marzolino, where we took a closer look at what actually makes communication effective—and where most people unknowingly get it wrong.
Why Communication Breaks Down
One of the most important insights from the session is that communication issues are rarely about the words themselves. They come from the layers underneath the words.
Things like:
- Body language that doesn’t match the message
- Tone that carries unintended emotion
- Speaking too quickly without space to process
- Struggling to regulate emotions in the moment
- A lack of awareness of how others experience your communication
These are subtle, but they’re powerful. And they’re often happening unconsciously.
You can say the “right” thing and still create tension, confusion, or resistance simply because of how it lands.
That’s where intentional communication starts to matter.
A Simple (But Revealing) Self-Audit
Instead of jumping straight into tactics, the session started with something more uncomfortable—and more useful.
A self-assessment.
Participants rated themselves from 1–10 across key communication elements:
- Pacing and timing
- Emotional regulation
- Pausing and listening
- Eye contact and presence
- Vocal tone and projection
- Movement and energy
- Language clarity and intention
This isn’t about scoring high. It’s about noticing patterns.
Where do you rush?
Where do you avoid?
Where do you lose presence?
Because if you’re not aware of how you show up in conversations, you don’t actually have control over the outcome.
Context vs. Content: The Shift Most People Miss
One of the biggest takeaways from the session was this:
Context matters more than content.
The emotional environment, your delivery, your energy—these shape how your message is received far more than the message itself.
Think about it. You’ve probably had conversations where the words were technically fine, but something still felt off.
That “something” is context.
To make this more actionable, conversations were broken down into three categories:
- Inform – sharing information clearly
- Inspire – motivating someone toward a goal
- Influence – guiding decisions or behavior
Most people don’t think about which type of conversation they’re having. They just start talking.
But when you’re clear on the goal, everything else can align—your tone, your pacing, your level of directness.
Without that clarity, you’re guessing. And it shows.
Preparing for Difficult Conversations (Instead of Avoiding Them)
Difficult conversations are where communication skills are truly tested.
Not in casual check-ins. Not in routine discussions. But in the moments where something actually matters.
The session walked through a practical framework to prepare for those conversations:
- Understand the other person’s perspective
- Get clear on your desired outcome
- Decide on the emotional tone you want to bring
- Choose your communication approach intentionally
This isn’t about scripting every word. It’s about walking in with awareness instead of reactivity.
Real examples brought this to life.
One participant shared challenges navigating communication with a business partner. Another was preparing for a deeply personal conversation with a parent about aging and dementia.
Different contexts. Same underlying skill.
When you approach these conversations with structure and intention, they become less about “getting through it” and more about actually creating a productive outcome.
Communication Is Not a Personality Trait
There’s a common assumption that some people are just “naturally good communicators.”
That’s not actually true.
They’re practiced.
Communication is a skill. Which means it can be developed, refined, and improved over time.
And the return on that investment is significant:
- Stronger team culture
- More effective leadership
- Clearer, more productive conversations
- Healthier professional and personal relationships
This isn’t about becoming polished or perfect. It’s about becoming more aware, more intentional, and more aligned in how you show up.
Why This Work Matters
In dentistry and coaching, you’re constantly navigating conversations that carry weight—performance issues, expectations, boundaries, emotions, growth.
Avoiding those conversations doesn’t make them easier. It just delays the impact.
Learning how to handle them well changes everything.
That’s why spaces like the IADLC Study Club exist. Not just to learn concepts, but to actually engage with them, apply them, and see how they play out in real-world situations.
Each session brings together professionals who are doing the work—on themselves, their leadership, and how they show up for others.
About Brandi Marzolino
As the Founder and Creator of the Empowered LeadHERship Experience for Women in Dental, Brandi guides powerhouse women in the dental industry; owner dentists, associates, leaders, and executives, into deeper clarity, purpose, and sustainable leadership. She helps women stop second-guessing themselves, ditch burnout, reclaim their voice, and lead from a place of power—not perfection. Find her here: https://leadhershipexperience.com/